Mary Jane 49

When Beethoven passed away, he was buried in a churchyard. A couple days later, the town drunk was walking through the cemetery and heard some strange noise coming from the area where Beethoven was buried. Terrified, the drunk ran and got the priest to come and listen to it. The priest bent close to the grave and heard some faint, unrecognizable music coming from the grave. Frightened, the priest ran and got the town magistrate. When the magistrate arrived, he bent his ear to the grave, listened for a moment, and said, "Ah, yes, that's Beethoven's Ninth Symphony, being played backwards." He listened a while longer, and said, "There's the Eighth Symphony, and it's backwards, too. Most puzzling." So the magistrate kept listening; "There's the Seventh... the Sixth... the Fifth..." Suddenly the realization of what was happening dawned on the magistrate; he stood up and announced to the crowd that had gathered in the cemetery, "My fellow citizens, there's nothing to worry about. It's just Beethoven decomposing."

bananas Are you a hoarder or do you throw things away?

er excuse me Aimee ,stop trying to be smart , we all know that

I think it will turn out to be one of the minor Royals ,like of of the cousins or neices and nephews , someone like that

I`ve never dressed up for Halloween , when i was growing up Halloween wasn`t celebrated here

For the last week I`ve had Jupiter from Holsts Planet Suite ,such lovely music

TRUE STORY A man was working on his motorcycle on the patio, his wife nearby in the kitchen. While racing the engine, the motorcycle accidentally slipped into gear. The man, still holding onto the handlebars, was dragged along as it burst through the glass patio doors. His wife, hearing the crash, ran in the room to find her husband cut and bleeding, the motorcycle, and the shattered patio door. She called for an ambulance and, because the house sat on a fairly large hill, went down the several flights of stairs to meet the paramedics and escort them to her husband. While the attendants were loading her husband, the wife managed to right the motorcycle and push it outside. She also quickly blotted up the spilled gasoline with some paper towels and tossed them into the toilet. After being treated and released, the man returned home, looked at the shattered patio door and the damage done to his motorcycle. He went into the bathroom and consoled himself with a cigarette while attending to his business. About to stand, he flipped the butt between his legs. The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard a loud explosion and her husband screaming. Finding him lying on the bathroom floor with his trousers blown away and burns on his buttocks, legs and groin, she once again phoned for an ambulance. The same paramedic crew was dispatched. As the paramedics carried the man down the stairs to the ambulance they asked the wife how he had come to burn himself. She told them. They started laughing so hard, one slipped, the stretcher and dumping the husband out. He fell down the remaining stairs, breaking his arm.

Broken cloud will bring a mixture of sunny spells and scattered showers. Those showers are likely to be most frequent down the west coast and inland in the south, blowing in on moderate west or northwesterly winds. Maximum temperature 12 °C.

GROSS--Grinning Ron Offered Sharon Sex THREE

calling her names

Well i wish they would , i`m dying to know !

Royal Family In Alleged Blackmail Plot Updated: 20:29, Sunday October 28, 2007 Buckingham Palace has refused to comment on an alleged "sex and drugs" blackmail plot targeting a member of the royal family. No word from the Palace The royal - who cannot be named for legal reasons - reportedly was forced to go to police after two men threatened to go public with tapes they claimed indicated the royal engaged in a sex act with an aide. It is believed a demand of £50,000 was suggested by the alleged blackmailers but a police sting ensured that the evidence was seized and the men arrested with no money exchanging hands. Sky News understands the royal allegedly targeted is not a senior member of the family. A spokesman for the Palace refused to discuss the details of the allegation other than to say that it was "a matter for the police". It followed a day of speculation initiated by a report in The Sunday Times detailing the alleged extortion plot. The newspaper said the supposed blackmailers first contacted the royal household on August 2. One of the men claimed to have video footage suggesting that a royal aide had an envelope containing cocaine supplied by a royal. It was also alleged during the conversation that a video tape showing an aide performing oral sex on the royal existed. The Sunday Times source said a senior legal adviser to the royal agreed with the blackmailers that he would see the tape before handing over the cash. In the meantime the Metropolitan Police had been asked to intervene. Posing as an aide, an undercover detective contacted the blackmailers and arranged a rendezvous at the London Hilton in Park Lane. The meeting was filmed secretly by officers in an adjacent room, according to the Sunday Times. Parts of the video were shown before detectives stepped in, seized the tape and arrested the two men. Scotland Yard said: "A 30-year-old man and 40-year-old man appeared at City of Westminster Magistrates' Court on 13th September each charged with one count of blackmail. "Both have been remanded in custody to reappear at the Old Bailey on 20th December."

This is a traditional Liverpool meal called Scouse, and where we get the name Scousers from Scouse Ingredients 2 LB (900g) Lamb Fillet, cubed 2 LB (900g) Potatoes, diced 10 Shallots, peeled and chopped 12oz (345g) carrots, diced 2 small leeks, chopped 2 celery sticks, chopped 1 pint (570 ml) Chicken Stock Half Level teaspoon dried Rosmary Half Level teaspoon dried Sage 2 Tablespoons olive oil Salt and Pepper Method 1. Heat 1 tablespoon of oil in a large pan, add lamb and fry until brown. 2. Heat 1 tablespoon of oil in frying pan, add carrots, celery and leeks, fry on low heat until light brown, add to saucepan and mix with lamb . 3. Stir in chicken stock, add seasoning and herbs, bring gently to the boil, stirring continuously. 4. Reduce heat and simmer for approx. 60 minutes until lamb is tender. 5. Add the potatoes and cook for a further 40 minutes until all vegetables are cooked, stir intermittently. 6. Serve immediately.

LOL brilliant --Thanks Ames

You name it they`ll do it

Ours went back last night ,I wish they would leave it alone , half my clocks are right , half are wrong now --what time is it?

The last person i said thank you to was Marion , for sending me the boxed set

Good day----Silly Bad day-----Depressed

I don`t want to know, I just want to enjoy it without having to feel guilty because i only eat fast food very occasionaly

How do you get five donkeys on a fire engine? Two in the front, two in the back, and one on the roof going EE-AW-EE-AW. How do you start an onion race? "Onion marks! Get set! Go! How do you catch a squirrel You climb up a tree and act like a nut. How do you keep an idiot in suspense? I'll tell you later. How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the psycho path. How do you get down from an elephant? You don't: you get down from a duck!

Ryan LOL

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!Have a lovely day

Lol Thats really good , Thanks pankie

Sharon I`ve never seen a beat eating a pumpkin HaHa Lovely picture Ames

YAY My book will be here on Wednesday ,half naked Ron????